Tuesday, August 14, 2007

I don't like change....

Call me dull...boring...set in my ways! But I don't like change. But God uses different things in our lives to bring about growth and to keep us on our knees! I'm at that place in my life where I'm
" changing places" with my parents! My dad is in the last stages of his life after battling with heart disease for more than 25 years. Open heart surgery, 3 heart attacks, and 3 pacemakers in all of those years. Now he's pretty much bedfast. So....I am closing down my daycare to help my mom take care of him.
I have been doing daycare for the most of the last 30 years and it will be difficult to not have children around me every day Monday through Friday. But, I really don't have a choice at this point. With my brother's death last year , I'm all they have left. It's not that I don't love them or don't want to take care of them. I just hate losing my kids and I love being at home. I'm an introvert, I guess you might say. I prefer keeping to myself alot. Not to the point of it being unhealthy. I do love being around other people as well. My parents, my kids and grandkids, the people in our church, and most of all my husband. I just love being in my own home.

But they need me right now. They've always been there for me, and now I want to be there for them. And....if my mom doesn't have some help she'll soon be down and then I'll have both of them to take care of...which will probably mean the nursing home. And I don't want that to happen if we can aviod it.

So...change is necessary at this point. And I'll deal with it. God will give me the grace and strength I need to face each day. He has never failed me. I trust Him with everything I have and every member of my family. I don't know what tomorrow holds, but I do know Who holds tomorrow!